Many couples seek therapy because they have developed entrenched negative patterns of relating to each other which make it very difficult to resolve misunderstandings and conflict. Impasses often result in either heated arguments or withdrawal, with both parties feeling misunderstood, alone and in considerable pain. Intimacy is eroded and mutual trust and feelings of safety may become severely compromised. We find our "worst selves" present too much of the time.

In my work with couples, I have found that uncovering and safely expressing the feelings and needs underlying their particular difficulties is the most effective way to bring about reciprocal understanding and appreciation. In creating a safe atmosphere for both of you, we can replace antipathy with empathy. This, in turn, makes space for new, loving patterns to emerge. Our "best selves" can show up again.

I have worked extensively with couples whose relationships have been troubled for some time, those who may be experiencing a traumatic disruption, as well as those whose difficulties may just be starting and who want to "nip things in the bud".